Reality Math

Well it’s not really math, but some equal balance I guess you would call it. It’s recently become more and more obvious to me how disconnected people are from their goals and reality. Like I said yesterday, talk is cheap. Doing something about the “talk” well that’s why there is the line that “actions speak louder than words” No where is this more apparent than what I see in terms of reality, goal setting, and work ethic. Case in point: A potential new client of mine e-mails the other day. This guy used to compete, but job, and lifestyle, wife, kids etc, his body got away from him. Hey, it happens. I don’t have a problem with that. But then he writes me and wants to get back into ship shape. Well, he wants to get back into ship shape, but he specifies he wants to do it “without sacrificing his social life, and without severe food restrictions” He hasn’t been under 200 lbs in 10 years but his goal is to be 160-170 lbs. So, this guy has about 30 pounds or so to lose which he has been carrying around for a good 6-7 years now. So in other words his “ordinary” day to day life is a physiology of being 30 or so pounds overweight. That word “ordinary” will come in to play later on in this Rant.
Next, my wife Annie frequently meets with an old friend and relative of hers. Same thing. This lady was once in pretty good shape, but marriage, divorce, children and hectic lifestyle have changed all of that. She now is really, really overweight. But every time Annie sees her it’s the same thing. She will drill Annie over and over with diet questions and questions about how Annie eats, and trains. She gets that from a lot of acquaintances. Now in the last 6 years or so, Annie’s diet hasn’t really changed at all, yet each time they meet it’s the same thing, questions and questions. The amazing thing is that this lady tells Annie that our diet is too “restrictive” and she doesn’t want to eat that way, yet she desperately wants to lose the weight. (I would guess at this point between 40-50 pounds). Seems that following a “less restrictive diet” has only worked in the opposite direction! She has tried everything, kickboxing, spinning, aerobic classes, running, walking, yoga, you name it. But she sees weighing food and dieting for 5 ½ to 6 days as “too restrictive” ??? Too restrictive. HHHmmm. As restrictive as being 50 pounds overweight must be? Especially psychologically when this same person expresses a desire ALL THE TIME, to not be overweight! And recently in tears over it.
Now believe me the CYCLE DIET is anything but restrictive, as many of you know. Not too many diets out there that allow for cheating and in any amounts, and with any foods you want. Annie has turned 50 and is in the shape of any 25 year old. Yet, someone else wants Annie’s results without Annie’s work. No time, no this, no that. Excuses, rationalizations etc.
This lady also has been carrying around excessive weight at least 8-9 years. It’s now her “ordinary” daily weight.
Next are people at the gym or check out people at the grocery store. Some are way, way overweight, but want to ask about this or that “fat burner” on the market. Give me a break. To the lady check out girl who is some 80 pounds overweight….. Did you not see the cases of tuna, and cases of egg whites we just purchased from you and have been for months now? No, instead it’s all about which fat burner we take, and how to take it.
Enough of this already. I have no problem with people being overweight if they are happy with themselves that way, I say great because being happy is the most important thing in life. (And I know many miserable fit people as well, but that’s another Rant altogether) But when you express a desire to do something “extra-ordinary” like to lose weight, or gain muscle, or be a better person, or compete etc, as an adult you need to realize it all comes with a price! So keep being your ordinary self, or decide to do something extra ordinary. And if you do, then do the reality math:
Here it is:
To all these above people and we all know people just like them so here is the math.
Extraordinary expectations, require extraordinary efforts
Extraordinary goals require extraordinary commitment and discipline
Extraordinary achievements require extraordinary sacrifices
PERIOD !!!!!!!!!
Anything less than both sides of the above equations is just wishful dreaming. So next time a person presents you with some ridiculous proposition of goals, give them the REALITY MATH equation I just stated.
If people aren’t willing to acknowledge that, let them continue being their usual “ordinary”
The same applies to the “process” of goal attainment. Every year I have countless bodybuilders and athletes, chomping at the bit to get dieting and ready for a show. Then once they are in the middle of it all, it’s a constant whine and complain show to everyone around them. Suck it up already! You choose to do this. If you are going to compete, compete like a champion, not a whining little baby. Too many bodybuilders forget the enjoyment of the whole process, and the challenge of it. Instead they make it all about winning or losing. That’s a loser mentality from the get go.
Why do these wannabe athletes make a drama out of everything? They over dramatize every little detail of the dieting/training regimen for whatever reason, and they do the same in their day to day lives as well. Get real! Enough of the false drama already. Get ready with the spirit and intent of a champion, or stick your thumb in your mouth so at least none of us have to listen to it !!! Better yet, buy a soother. What’s my point? My point is its really easy to be excited about any project before you undertake it. That’s a no brainer. Being excited BEFORE you take on a challenge is easy, staying excited and inspired in the throws of the challenge is the stuff self-respect and champions are made of. (I know many of you have heard that before from me, but I keep having to repeat it each year)
Want proof? Right now we are in the middle of Round One of the Stanley Cup Playoffs. Real Athletes, real stuff on the line, after a year of hard work and sacrifice, and a lifetime of dreaming of such a moment. This weekend Ottawa Defenseman Wade Redden lost his mother to cancer. He missed Sunday’s game for her funeral. But there he was back in Tues game in Tampa where he scored a goal and got two assists. Perspective folks. He could have been and stayed with his family and no one would have faulted him. Instead with a heavy heart he made the game, played the game, and excelled in the game. No whining, no dramatizing to the media, just an inspired effort at gut check time. That is a champion both of the game, and of life.
Please remember that next time you want a pat on the back for “sticking to your diet”